The Sunshine House, Or Musical Retirement

in: the grave

I like a lot of songs. And I just so happen to really, truly like a lot of bad songs. Glimpse my iPod on BART, or use the elliptical next to mine at the gym, and you’re sure to catch some fairly embarrassing things. I admit to still occasionally partaking in a little pop-punk (ask me about that rediscovery sometime) and even some pure ’60s sugar, and I find that, sometimes, the unsubstantial can be comforting. But not every song has redeeming qualities. Some are fraught with disquieting memories, and others are so bad they hit bad-good and simply wrapped back around. And those are the ones I’ve finally begun saying my good-byes to. That’s where my newest feature, The Sunshine House, comes into play.

The Sunshine House, which is a nod to the daycare center of the same overly cheery name, is my way of bidding songs a proper adieu. There are more than enough tracks to serve as proper fodder for this sort of feature, and I think it can make for fun, short entries.

To kick things off, I created a mix on 8tracks of twenty-five love songs that are ripe for retirement.

The Sunshine House Collective: track listing below (click on link to listen to mix via 8tracks)

I’ve spent about ten years composing calculated mix CDs for the boys for whom I harbor intense crushes, and I’ve learned there are only so many times Ben Gibbard can coo that he’ll follow me into the dark without it becoming insincere. Certain songs get old fast. Don’t get me wrong – I have intense relationships with a number of love songs, include these tracks I’ve included on The Sunshine House Collective, from “This is the Sweetest Little Song” by Butch Walker and the Let’s-Go-Out-Tonites to Wilco’s “I’m the Man Who Loves You.” And not all of these songs are bad or overwrought or overplayed, but love songs are a complicated sort. Like every girl shaped by cinema, I form unbreakable associations between people and songs, and so many of these tracks are forever tainted by these associations. “Treehouse” was Duck’s song, while “Thirteen,” “Sixteen, Maybe Less” and “First Day of My Life” were all about being sixteen and positively infatuated with the first boy I ever thought I loved. Some love songs are timeless; “Everlong” will never lose its luster, while the early Beatles pop songs will always perfectly describe the careful build-up of a love story. But some of these tracks can never be applied to another chapter in my romantic life. I’ve liked a lot of boys, and a lot of songs are headed to this musical graveyard, but, for now, we can get started with these twenty-five. Suffice to say, these tracks won’t be making any mixes for the foreseeable future.

The the line-up’s below. I can’t promise I’ll be back in full force just yet; I know I’ve been away a long time, but I’m sans computer currently, and it’s hard to promise regular blog posts without one. I am living in San Francisco currently, and that’s looking like a more permanent thing, so hopefully I’ll be able to carve out a more regular post schedule soon. But, for now:

The Sunshine House Collective:

  1. “Every Thug Needs A Lady” – Alkaline Trio
  2. “This Is The Sweetest Little Song” – Butch Walker & The Let’s-Go-Out-Tonites
  3. “The Tension and the Terror” – Straylight Run
  4. “The Scientist” – Coldplay
  5. “Mixtape” – Butch Walker
  6. “Intoxicating” – David Crowder Band
  7. “I’m A Fool” – American Hi-Fi
  8. “Thirteen” – Ben Kweller
  9. “16, Maybe Less” – Iron & Wine/ Calexico
  10. “I Will Follow You Into The Dark” – Death Cab For Cutie
  11. “Treehouse” – I’m From Barcelona
  12. “First Day of My Life” – Bright Eyes
  13. “This Year’s Love” – David Gray
  14. “The Luckiest” – Ben Folds
  15. “Calling You” – Blue October
  16. “Happy Together” – The Turtles
  17. “The Promise” – When In Rome
  18. “More Than a Feeling” – Boston
  19. “I Want You to Want Me” – Cheap Trick
  20. “Everytime We Touch” – Cascada
  21. “So Contagious” – Acceptance
  22. “Crash Into Me” – Dave Matthews Band
  23. “Oh, It’s Love” – hellogoodbye
  24. “I’m the Man Who Loves You” – Wilco
  25. “Beating Heart Baby” – Head Automatica

About a Girl: Shiny, Shiny Pants and Bleach-Blonde Hair

on: tap, on: the girl

Unlock my body and move myself to dance
Moving warm liquid, flowing blowing glass

I miss the innocence I’ve known
Playing KISS covers, beautiful and stoned

Sometimes, y’know, I feel like there are things I’ve got to tell y’all. I have to wax poetic to my audience of me. Or not. Sometimes I just feel like talking.

It’s been a weird year. In some ways, I’ve had a maturity growth spurt, but mostly I just feel like I’m in middle school all over again. I’m thirteen but foolishly entrusted with a driver’s license and the legal ability to purchase alcohol. Some things don’t change; I’ve spent my summer biking around, gorging myself on chocolate, trying to read Vonnegut‘s entire bibliography (again, middle school flashback), pretending I am thinking about going to the gym, when I know all too well I’ll just watch another episode of “Mad Men” on Netflix Instant. I’ve listened to more Ben Kweller than I should likely admit, though the (very talented) musician hasn’t released a new album that I’ve heard in full since 2006.


Ben Kweller, “Thirteen”
(See also: “Sundress“)

But, some things have changed. Like, for the first time since Matt Hester*, I don’t want to be anyone’s girlfriend. Not Ducky’s. Not The Chemist’s (despite the insistence of everyone else, I really just want to keep being his best friend). Not the unnamed, straight San Francisco gentleman with no face who I occasionally fantasize will sweep me off my feet come fall. I don’t want the responsibility of caring for or about anyone else, and I don’t want the pleasure of shedding ten thousand tears over stupid arguments. And, yes. Right now, and for the foreseen future, being someone’s girlfriend would be a burden. I’m still (slowly but hopefully surely) getting me together again.

I’m not ready to buckle down to be anyone but me, as cheesy as that may sound. But seriously. Academically and professionally and socially, I’ve been a bit of a dolt, and I am desperately ready for a fresh (homeless, exciting and influential) start in San Francisco come fall. And Charlie Conway came back to me! I’m taking that as a major league sign that things are lookin’ up.

Here’s the long n’ short of it all: I’m exorcising all of the bitchiness from my life. That’s my major solution. I’m clipping my tongue and watching the sarcasm; I’m putting the stops on friendships that do little more than antagonize or patronize me; and I’m ridding myself of the habits, possessions and tendencies that propel me to behave like an egotistical, superficial, money-grubbing Queen Bee.

So, that’s that. I’m pleasingly moving forward. I’m listening to a lot of Sha Sha. I’m preparing for San Francisco. I’m refusing to be any man’s Robin. And I’m generally behavin’.

‘Cept when I wear my bikini to the Wal-Mart and they ask me to leave.

Happy August, friends.

*Matt Hester, if you’re reading this, thanks for coming to my cosmic bowling party in seventh grade. And for the brown and white stuffed dog from Kohl’s. He’s doing well.

A.V. Club: Check Out This Budding Filmmaker (& His Blogging Friend)

in: viewing room

My very dear friend Greg (mono man, get yourself well!) wrote and directed this short film for Campus Movie Fest, the world’s largest student film festival. It’s this really brilliantly dark and humorous bit that you really must watch for yourself. Give it a go – I think it may be Greg Porper’s (keep that name in mind, folks) best work yet.

Also, watch his hilarious web series, “The Triple,” on YouTube.

Also, give a gander to the hilarious Impressionable Man’s Blog. It’s written by my best friend, the Duckster, and it’s chocked full of gut-clutchingly funny anecdotes, videos and musings. It’s a rare shimmer of total blogging brilliance.

The Dunce Cap: June 28, 2010

in: heavy rotation

From Anchor Tattoos and Piercings

The Dunce Cap, Vol. 14: I like the face you make and when you dance with me. (mix via 8tracks)

1. “Factory” – Band of Horses
2. “Boyfriend” – Best Coast
3. “She’s Electric” – Oasis
4. “You Always Make Me Smile” – Kyle Andrews
5. “Doctor My Eyes” – Jackson Browne
6. “Get You Back” – Oh Mercy
7. “Can You Tell” – Ra Ra Riot
8. “Fireworks” – Tender Trap
9. “Be Here Now” – Ray LaMontagne
10. “Rainbow Everywhere” – Wavves

Sorry this one’s coming oh-so-late, folks. It’s been a hectic week.

This week’s mix is a grab bag of songs n’ handclaps. We start off with the first single from the killer new Band of Horses album, Infinite Arms. Band of Horses is a band I’ve really been digging for a while now. They have a really reverb-y sound that allows for these soaring choruses and rushing guitar lines (see their excellent track “Is There a Ghost?” from 2007’s Cease to Begin), and they manage to convey emotion without sounding too heady. Then there’s a really terrific diddy from L.A.’s Pitchfork darlings Best Coast, an adorably cheeky song reminiscent of early girl groups. There’s my favorite Ra Ra Riot track (for the Duckster, of course), a cool Tender Trap track (say that five times fast!) and an entirely endearing song from Oh Mercy, a band I stumbled across while watching – like every other preteen in America…oh, wait – ABCFamily’s “Pretty Little Liars.”

It’s a playlist with a lot more sappy emotion than I usually permit, but, I suppose, I’m missing a certain someone, and it’s starting to show in my recent mixes. You’d like him too, y’know. Try not to gag; it’s really not too totally saccharine. Nothing with Wavves can really ever be marred – even by Jackson Browne.

Happy listening.

(editor’s note – this photo comes from Ryan and Brooke Cook. Happy Fourth. Stay safe and enjoy some of the Dunce Cap while you’re grilling out!)